


Mould Cultures

by sleepymccoy



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, Old Married Couple, Old Married Spones, spones - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-19
Updated: 2015-11-19
Packaged: 2018-05-02 08:14:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5241146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sleepymccoy/pseuds/sleepymccoy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spock agrees to give an interview in his house, McCoy makes things difficult.<br/>Established relationship, old married couple</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mould Cultures

Spock had agreed to assist a studying reporter, the son of a friend from his years lecturing at Starfleet Academy. The young Andorian was very keen and polite, and Spock was glad to show him around his home to give him something to write up on for his assessment. He had been concerned his homelife would be relatively dull for the young man, but McCoy had assured him that everyone loved writing any kind of article on Spock, because it gave them an excuse to “harp on” about his old accomplishments. And so Spock found himself standing in his hallway 45 minutes before he had to leave for Denobulous discussing the layout of his house.

McCoy turned to the reporter and his cameraman and clapped his hands happily, "And this is Spock's study room. We're not allowed in here. I'm pretty sure it's just computers and equipment. I mean, it's not like he's got some kinky guy strapped up for fun times. Right, Spock?" The reporter looked confused, but the camera woman was hiding a smile. She'd met Doctor McCoy once before, and he was proving to be just as entertaining in his home as he was in hospital.

  
"Pardon?" Spock glared at McCoy in the vain hope it would shut him up. What he had expected to be a swift and pleasant process had become quite taxing. His husband was certainly enjoying himself.

  
McCoy grinned. "You don't have anyone in there, do you?"

  
"There is nothing alive in my room,” Spock said slowly.

  
"Good. That's what I thought." He turned to the reporter and smiled.

  
"Except my mould cultures,” Spock spoke up from behind McCoy.

  
McCoy spun around, "Well, that's hardly a sex thing for you, is it?" He looked at Spock more intensely. "Is it?"

  
"Doctor." Spock was close to begging his husband to stop implying sexual deviancy in front of recording equipment.

  
A thought struck McCoy. "Wait, how do you keep track of them when you're away?" he asked.

  
Spock was only too glad to discuss this instead. "I have an automated system set up. It sends me updates and I can remotely access the various elements if necessary."

  
"What about when you don't have access? Isn't it a risk?" McCoy asked.

  
"I have not lost access for more than 46 hours as yet. They survived just fine." Spock was very glad to have a safe topic of conversation.

  
McCoy's face fell. "What about when you went quiet for - Spock don't say that - Were you accessing your mould cultures for the fortnight you didn't contact me?" McCoy was now paying full attention to Spock, completely disregarding the presence of the camera.

  
Spock grimaced slightly. "I was receiving information from them, yes. I did not attempt any corrections as they were fine without my interference." He was fairly sure he couldn't've made a connection, anyway. That was why he hadn't been able to contact Starfleet, and thereby McCoy, during the time.

  
McCoy took to step forward, he was now well within Spock's personal space. "You found the time to check on your mould cultures, but not your damn husband?" he whispered viciously.

  
"I do not believe I would have been able to send a communication to you via the mould cultures, Doctor. You did not know of them." Spock said, using McCoy’s professional title in an attempt to remind him of their company before the conversation turned into a full-blown argument.

  
"That's not my point! You have a back door communication with your mould cultures, and not me! What if it happens again? Like on Çanee 2, and I don't know if you're even alive, but your mould cultures - your mould cultures damned well know you're alright!" McCoy was nigh spitting with fury now.

  
Spock paused. He had not considered this side of things. But Leonard had the full communication abilities of Starfleet at his fingertips should needs be. "Leonard, Starfleet-"

  
"Fuck Starfleet!" McCoy yelled at him, leaving the hallway swiftly.

  
Spock turned to the reporter and his appropriately somber companion to attempt to salvage the interview.

 

\-----

  
  
Spock could hear McCoy making tea in the kitchen. He knocked before entering. "Leonard."

  
McCoy didn't turn around. "Is the interview guy still here?" he asked.

  
"Yes. He is filming the yard." Spock wished he could see McCoy's face.

  
"Sorry if I screwed up that take or something," he said, still committedly working on the tea.

  
Spock sighed slightly. "You have nothing to apologise for."

  
McCoy turned around. He hadn't been crying, but it was a close call. "Well, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be posing by a tree or something?" McCoy said, alarmingly casual.

  
Spock had no idea how to handle this. "Leonard, I'm sorry I have upset you."

  
McCoy looked at him scathingly. "I'm sure," he said, grabbing his tea and moving towards the side door to leave.

  
Spock caught up with him quickly. "Do not walk away, please. I leave in half an hour and I would prefer to discuss this."

 

 

McCoy turned, holding his teacup close to his chest so the steam clouded his face. "Why? I'll just stay here and stew in my emotions, or whatever it is you imagine I do while you're gone, and your mould will be fine without you. Everything's good." His words were strong but the delivery was off. He finished looking down at his cup and almost mumbling the last few words.

  
Spock still had no idea what to say. He wished the correct course for this conversation would appear soon. "It is very important mould, Leonard," he attempted.

  
McCoy huffed a small laugh. "Never doubted that."

  
Silence fell for a moment. McCoy looked unbearably uncomfortable. Spock took a breath, and McCoy looked at him expectantly. Spock felt his brain stall. "I am unsure what to say."

  
McCoy's expression turned instantly grumpy and he rolled his eyes. "I am not accustomed to being second best to mould in my marriage."

  
Spock felt a moment of panic. Their marriage was above everything and could not be considered comparable to his mould. "This has nothing to do with our marriage, surely," Spock said, distress appearing on his face.

  
McCoy's eyes softened, although his mouth remained in its frown. “Ok, I'm not accustomed to being second best to mould, ever."

  
Spock spoke without thinking. "There was that time involving Kana 3. And that time when-"

  
McCoy put a hand up. "Spock, now is not the right moment for you to list all the times you've put mould cultures before me."

  
He stopped. "Of course."

  
McCoy looked at Spock. He took a sip of his tea. "Look, I know your science is important to you, and that's great, but you gotta get me something that lets me know you're ok? Like, you press a button every 12 hours or some shit so I know you're still kicking even if you can't send me regular updates. ‘Cos I lose sleep and I can't focus on anything when you've gone radio silence. And the mould thing just adds insult to injury." McCoy's eyes started to shine with tears. He hastily drank some more tea, his eyes welling up, but whether that was due to the hot tea or emotion, Spock was unsure.

  
Spock studied him for 20 seconds. There were ways he could set a system like that up. It may take some time and effort. One or two favours. But it should be doable. "I shall look into it," he said.

  
McCoy's shoulders finally relaxed. "Great," he said. He seemed sincere, if lacking in excitement.

  
Spock looked at him. "I am sorry," he said.

  
McCoy finished off his tea and put the cup down on the counter, turning around and leaning against it to look at Spock. "It's ok. I never… I never let you know how bad it gets." He crossed his arms and looked at his feet.

 

Spock stared. He had not seen Leonard looking this vulnerable in some time. "Would you like me to skip this trip?" he offered. It would be difficult to pull off in a professional manner this close to his scheduled departure, but he had contacts in Denobula. He could arrange everything if need be.

  
McCoy's eyes stayed on the ground. "Ha. Yes. But I won't ask it." He looked up at Spock. "You should go. Don't stop your life just ‘cos I'm getting old and sentimental," he added sincerely.

  
Spock walked over to him, "I can think of no better reason to stay."

  
McCoy smiled softly. "Nah, I'd feel guilty. Besides, I'm seeing Scotty tonight. Can't exactly bail on him. He gets all pouty." McCoy let out a wry smile at the thought.

  
Spock lowered his head in a minor bow. "Very well." A thought occurred to him. "When I return I would like to teach you how to care for my mould cultures while I'm gone."

  
McCoy's smile grew into a grin. "But that would involve entering the fabled Sex Dungeon of Spock!" He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

  
This offer may have been a mistake.

  
"Please desist in calling it that. But, yes," Spock said.

 

McCoy smiled warmly, shaking his head. "You don't gotta do that, I got no issues with you having a private room. Besides, what if I sneeze on them or something?" He seemed sincerely concerned.

  
"They are in a fully contained unit. You would have to put in some effort to kill them." Spock said, praying his husband wasn't still angry enough to actually try and kill his mould. They were quite promising cultures and it seemed like they may help pave the way to a vaccine for Andorian fever.

  
"Yeah, alright. Thanks," McCoy said, laying a hand on Spock's arm in gratitude.

  
Spock caught a smile before it formed, sure Leonard had noticed it regardless, but it is good practice to stop himself displaying needless emotion. "It is nothing," he said.

  
Mccoy rolled his eyes again. "Sure it is. Ok, enough mould talk. Your interview guys need to be shown out," he said, edging past Spock.

  
Spock was only too pleased to see the end of this particular conversation. "Very well. Would you care to join me?"

  
"Mr. Spock," McCoy said with a grin, "It would be my genuine pleasure."

 

\-----

  
  
  
"Thank you very much for your time, Ambassador, Doctor," the reporter said, going to shake Spock's hand. McCoy swooped in and saved Spock from the physical contact.

  
"Yes, it's been a privilege. You've made up, then?" the camera woman asked. The reporter threw her a glare for asking such a rude question.

  
Spock was surprised at the invasive inquiry. "That is most-"

  
McCoy interrupted, getting something of a kick out of the improper woman. "Yeah, the illogical bastard agreed to show me his dungeon of pleasures." He grinned over at Spock, who rolled his eyes.

  
"That is hardly an accurate description of the room," Spock said.

  
McCoy looked surprised. "Really? Oh dear, you're telling the truth, aren't you?" He began to look concerned.

  
Spock frowned. "Yes, of course I am," he said, exasperation coming through in his voice.

  
McCoy bounced back on his heels. "Well, I use my private room for sex. Got a lovely lass all rigged up for me there," he said with a grin.

  
Spock stared at him in disbelief for a moment before turning to the reporters. "He is joking," he said.

  
"How would you know if I'm joking?" McCoy said, laughing. "Unless you've been in there?"

  
Spock caught himself before letting out a very human sigh. He turned away from the reporter and spoke quietly, "I can tell when you've had sex, Leonard."

  
McCoy rolled his eyes, unimpressed. "Only ‘cos I'm having sex with you," he said, far too loudly for Spock's liking.

  
He leaned in closer. "No, it is something else," he whispered.

  
The reporter spoke up at this point, "I think we should leave." The camera woman turned to him to complain, but was silenced with a truly powerful glare.

  
She sighed. "Yes, have a good day. Bon voyage, Ambassador," she waved a goodbye.

  
Spock turned to the two, "Thank you for coming. Farewell." He turned away with McCoy and walked off to the house. The reporter and his camera woman left as well.

  
McCoy walked in a cooperative silence for while before speaking up. Unfortunately, the minor distraction of the reporter leaving had not caused a change in topic. "Well how can you tell, then?" he asked.

  
Spock did sigh now. He decided to simply be honest. "You smell different."

  
McCoy looked at him in amazement. "YOU CAN SMELL IT!?" he shouted.

  
Spock looked behind them to check how far away the departing camera crew were. "Please keep your voice down, Leonard," he said, considering if begging would work to shut his husband up.

  
McCoy was running his hand through his hair, talking to himself more than Spock now, "But every time I've. .. I thought I was so sneaky. Even after a shower?" He turned to him, clearly expecting a response to the last question.

 

"I believe I am aware of all your in-shower orgasms," Spock said, resigning himself fully to the conversation.  

  
McCoy dropped his hand, stunned. "Damn," he said.

  
Spock looked at him sideways and raised an eyebrow. "You are not as quiet as you seem to think, either," he said with nearly a smirk.

  
McCoy noticed his expression and let out a laugh. "Yeah, well. What can I say. I have fun. Don't you ever have a sneaky wank?" he asked, giving Spock a sly look.

  
How his husband could be considered an expert in psychology and medical observation and yet miss the obvious in his own home would forever be a mystery to Spock. "I do not masturbate for pleasure. Simply to serve a biological necessity while you are not with me."

  
McCoy paused and thought about this for a moment. "So, what, if we haven't gone at it for a while...?"

  
"The situation has not yet arisen where you do not wish to copulate with me for so extended a period of time while I am here, discounting extended illness of course," Spock said, opening the front door for the both of them.

  
"So, just while you're off on your diplomatic missions?" McCoy closed the door behind the both of them, but remained in the entranceway, forcing Spock to stand there with him.

  
Spock sighed again. Clearly Leonard simply wished to hear about his masturbating habits. "Yes.  The thought begins to intrude upon my meditation after a week and a half. Therefore after a week I generally…" he struggled to finish the sentence.

  
"Pull the pipe?" McCoy offered.

  
"Concisely put," Spock said dryly.

  
McCoy grinned nervously. "So, d'you think about me?"

  
Spock was honestly startled and he was sure it showed. "Of course I think of you." What else would he think about? He'd only ever had sexual thoughts about Leonard. And it had even taken at least eight months into their relationship before he'd been interested sexually. Of course, once that had started they'd been going strong ever since.

  
McCoy bounced back on his feet and smiled. "Ok, just let me summarise here. ‘Cause it's pretty damn flattering. The thought of me makes you so horny you can't meditate?" He leaned forward with a huge grin. Spock was rather relieved to see him so happy.

  
"I will agree to that if it ends this conversation," Spock said.

  
McCoy's laugh was almost a cackle, "Hell no it doesn't end this conversation!" He paused and a thought struck him. "Wait, how long are you away this time?" he asked.

  
“3 days. Just to Denobulous," Spock said.

  
McCoy frowned. "Damn." Spock raised an eyebrow at that. McCoy rushed to explain, "Well, no, it's good, of course. But when's your next trip that's more than a week?"

  
Spock paused, beginning to get quite suspicious. "…What is the purpose of this line of questioning?" he asked slowly.

  
McCoy grinned again. "Just- just answer me, yeah?" he said happily.

  
Spock looked at him for a moment and considered. "Next month. The 7th to the 20th." he said finally.

  
McCoy looked thoughtful for a moment before nodding to himself and heading towards the kitchen. "Wait, Leonard, what are you planning?" Spock said sharply, following him.

  
"Hmm?" McCoy turned and looked at him. "Nothing, darlin'," he drawled. Spock had been fairly sure what direction McCoy's mind had turned and the layered accent just confirmed his fears. McCoy only got the accent going when he was exhausted, too angry or happy to contain it, or just plain turned on. Spock theorized this was the latter situation. Inconvenient. The last thing he needed fifteen minutes before going on a three day trip was a horny, devious husband.

  
Spock walked into the next room, where McCoy was waiting for him, leaning against the countertop. "Perhaps it would be best to continue this conversation later. After my trip," Spock said.

  
McCoy grinned, looking Spock up and down slowly. He pushed off from the counter and wandered leisurely over to Spock.

  
Spock remained still while McCoy completely disregarded all concepts of personal space and leaned in towards him. McCoy's hand rested lightly on Spock's hip and he leant in towards his pointed ear and nipped it slightly with his mouth and murmured, "Whatever you like, darlin'," Spock felt a small shiver run through his body.

  
Without warning, McCoy spun away from Spock, ever the tease, and said loudly, "We’ll discuss it when you're back, then." He looked back at Spock and raised an eyebrow, "I still gotta get you back for that mould thing."

  
Spock sighed and crossed his arms, "Just so long as you do not convert my room to a sex dungeon."

  
McCoy's face lit up instantly, "Now there's a thought I hadn't had!" He turned and left the room while Spock grimaced. "I'll grab your bags," McCoy yelled back through the door.

  
"No," Spock sighed. Endless. This marriage was endlessly tiresome. "You are not as young as you once were, Leonard," Spock followed him out to the hallway where McCoy was standing over his bags and glaring at him. "I shall carry them," Spock said.

  
"And what are you trying to say there?" McCoy asked pointedly.

  
"I am saying, Leonard," he said while picking up his bags from McCoy's feet, "that you are thin enough to be put on display beside the mummies at the current Egyptian exhibition." Spock looked at McCoy gravely for a moment.

  
McCoy was deadly silent for a few seconds before bursting out into full bodied laughter, "Shit, Spock!" Spock smiled lightly, and turned to walk towards the front door, McCoy trailing behind him, still giggling. "So, it ok if I walk with you to the door? You think these ol' bones can take it?"

  
Spock's smile remained and he shook his head slightly. "I have it on good authority that those 'ol' bones' can take quite a bit more than one would imagine," Spock said, opening the door for them both.

  
"Why, Ambassador Spock, I do believe you are alluding to something improper there," McCoy said, grinning easily as he sauntered through into their garden.

  
McCoy turned around and looked at Spock expectantly. Spock put the bags down at their feet and looked back at McCoy, quirking an eyebrow. "I am affronted by the suggestion," he said, leaning in for a kiss.

  
McCoy smiled lazily at him, putting a hand on the back of his head and kissed him softly. They stood there, silently embracing for a few seconds as their kiss deepened. Spock leaned back at McCoy's eyes fluttered open. "I'll miss you," McCoy whispered.

  
"It is only three days, Leonard," Spock said. McCoy's eyebrows scrunched together in anger and he hastily added, "Regardless, I will miss you too."

  
McCoy looked entirely unimpressed. "Yeah, nice save," he said, rolling his eyes.

  
Spock put his hand softly on McCoy's face, his fingertips brushing McCoy's lips. "I will miss you terribly, Leonard," he said, leaning in close.

  
McCoy glanced down and knocked his slippers against Spock's shoes, "Yeah, alright, don't go getting all sappy on me now." He looked into Spock's eyes and smiled sadly. "Three days," he said.

  
"Three days," Spock repeated, putting his two fingers together in ozh'esta and pressing them to McCoy's lips. McCoy kissed his fingers softly, then wrapped his hand around Spock's wrist and moved his hand away.

  
"Ok," McCoy said, looking at Spock levelly. "Let's get these bags to the front gate!" He bent down to pick one up.

  
Spock snatched the bag out from McCoy's outstretched fingers, "We just had this conversation. No carrying." Spock picked up the rest of his bags and headed down the path.

  
"What! It's the lightest one! I'm not an invalid," McCoy said, following him grumpily.

 

"How would you know how much it weighs," Spock asked.

  
"Fine, it's the smallest one. Same thing." Spock could see McCoy flapping his arms about in frustration out of the corner of his eye.

  
"Size is not an accurate method of determining the weight of-"

  
"Oh no, don't start"

  
"- Various objects. If you had a cubic meter of iron and a cubic meter of aluminium-"

  
"I'm not in the mood for a lecture."

  
"- The iron would weigh 7300 kilograms, whereas the aluminium would weigh a mere-"

  
"How do you even know this?"

  
"-2600 kilograms. Therefore you have no way of telling how heavy-"

  
"Well, d'you have a cubic meter of iron in there?"

  
"-The contents of this bag are, and as such-"

  
"Oh, Spock."

  
"- As such! You should not attempt to lift it." Spock placed the bags on the ground by the gate and looked at McCoy seriously. "Especially not when there is someone else present who is able to lift it for you," he added softly.

  
McCoy harrumphed and looked around angrily.

  
"Leonard," Spock said, keen to convey his message before he had to leave, "your bones are brittle. You know this. Please do not attempt anything unwise while I am away." McCoy kept looking diligently at the ground. "Please," Spock added.

  
McCoy looked at him, suddenly furious, "I'm not a damn child, Spock!" He started to pace. "I can take care of myself."

  
"I'm aware of that, I simply worry when I am gone," Spock said calmly.

 

McCoy whirled around and looked at him. "Then don't be gone," he suggested, layering heavy sarcasm over the words.

  
Spock looked at him for a moment, "That is unfair."

  
McCoy's face crumpled slightly. "I know it's unfair" he spat out, hitting the fence. He turned away from Spock for a moment and looked at the sky before walking back to him. "I'm sorry," he said, taking in Spock's expression, trying to judge how far he'd gone. "I know I'm important to you. God knows why. I definitely don't want you to give up your career. It's good," he said sincerely.

  
Spock kissed him lightly. "It is no matter," he said.

  
McCoy glanced upwards and murmured, "Your ride's here." Spock followed his gaze to the shuttle craft approaching in the distance.

  
"It appears so," Spock said quietly. He leaned in and gave McCoy a full kiss, separating only when the shuttle began its landing. "Enjoy your three days, Leonard. Don't do anything strenuous. Give my regards to Mr. Scott," he said.

  
"Take care. Don't have too much fun. Come home safe," McCoy said, giving Spock one last quick kiss on the mouth before forcibly spinning him around and pushing him towards the shuttle, which was now waiting with its side door open.

  
Spock walked calmly towards the shuttle. He boarded, then turned to properly  bid his husband farewell before the door shut behind him. He held his hand up in the Vulcan salute and said, "Sleep well, ashayam. My thoughts will be with you."

  
McCoy held his hand up in a perfect salute and said, "I'm going to piss on your mould, Spock."  
Spock dropped the salute in shock as the door closed in front of him. "Do not urinate on my-" the door shut, cutting off his wildly confused response. He could see McCoy laughing madly, holding onto their fence as the shuttle rose up. McCoy looked up and blew a kiss toward Spock, who shook his head desperately, sending McCoy into fits of laughter again. The shuttle paused as it reached a certain height, Spock looked down at the small figure that was his husband. He saw McCoy raise his hand in farewell and head back towards the house, then the shuttle sped off into space.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys liked it! I'm the artist and the author.  
> Thanks to greenpeenqueen and spocksbedsidemanner for beta-ing and helping me post pictures, you guys are marvelous!


End file.
